God is speaking!
As I was taking a shower this morning after my workout, God started to speak to me. I was out with some friends last night, we went to a worship night and then out for Tacos (Tacos is a standard way of life haha). As we were all sitting enjoying each others company, over a period of time 3 consecutive occasions we had different people come to our table to ask if we were interested or would buy their product from them. One particular person came in playing his violin and then would walk to different tables to see if people would donate to him. Each occasion I didn’t put my hand in my pocket to support or help their cause.
God has been talking to me about TRUST, do I trust Him. I would conjure up scenarios of what I am willing to do for my Lord and saviour, the lover of my soul. Quite often I would be quite extreme and swing from side of the spectrum to the other. The common one we as Christians discuss is, would I die for Jesus. During this journey and process of growing in Trusting Jesus, I’m having these different dialogues with Jesus. I have currently been in this process of deciding whether I would accept and say yes to an event I have been invited to by a very new but good friend and this event would cost me, it requires a step of faith, a rather bold one at that too, but I am determined to grow and allow Jesus to develop me into His nature and likeness. So in this process, I really perceived God saying to me through the Holy Spirit yesterday with this; How will you die for me if you struggle so much to trust me with your finances. How will you die for me if it is so hard for you to book flight or accommodation and be worried about your bank balance – who is your God?!
Ok, so back to my revelation in the shower this morning. As I’m standing there with the water running down my head, God shows me one of these people standing at the table asking if we would buy their product, all of a sudden, I was looking at myself, standing there at the table looking at myself holding my e-book. Ok, I haven’t gone up to people holding my e-book and asking them to buy it but I have done it virtually. I don’t feel condemned or guilty but just a deep conviction of God taking me deeper into His Kingdom and bringing His Kingdom, manifesting His Kingdom here on Earth. As I’m going on this journey and allowing God to take me deeper, I am sensing His loving hand, His gentle whisper, His kind embrace encourage me to Trust Him, trust Him in all things with all things and to truly grow in the revelation of His goodness, His LOVE for and towards me. When we don’t really know someone we don’t really trust them, we keep them at arms length away. God is wanting to show and reveal to us how much He loves us, yes, He sent Jesus into this World to die for us and that is enough, that statement is enough, knowing that is enough.
I am praying right now that we would grasp that love, that, that love would break through our barriers, break through the barriers we have put up to protect us and that are really keeping Him out. Jesus!!! Break these barriers down and come into my heart, my Soul!! Come in to the deepest parts of my being, have your way, have it all!! I repent Father for holding back, holding out, being prideful, not allowing you to truly sit on the throne of my heart, I repent for asking others to support me when I am not helping others while I can. Father, thank you for helping me to trust you, thank you for your faithfulness and helping me in my weaknesses, where I’m vulnerable where I still hurt and hoard pain and unforgiveness. Thank you for loving me so much that you will not leave me in my broken state. Thank you, Jesus!!!
